It does what it says on the tin. This was written while procrastinating and not writing my 20,000 dissertation in England. August 2012.
On Avoiding Writing Papers: The Ultimate How-To Guide
- Take up an avid interest in a new YouTube sensation, preferably a series so it takes up more time. Possible options include: Bad Lip Synchers, AutoTune the news, or any of the myriad parents who produce weekly videos of their children singing popular music hits.
- Rediscover your love of 90’s sitcoms and search them out on a crappy online streaming service. (Suggestions: Home Improvement, Family Matters, Designing Women, Frasier)
- Take to making elaborate meals that require at least an hour of prep time, – not to mention a special trip to the grocery – an hour of cooking, eating, and lots of cleanup.
- Try your hand at a new hobby. Say, drawing perhaps. Or an old one. I’ve heard knitting is especially time-consuming.
- Seek out every speck of dirt in your house and remove it. Daily. Who knew you could waste spend 2 profitable hours cleaning your bathroom?
- Suddenly remember all those things you’ve been meaning to do for ages, like alphabetizing your DVDs, making color-coded folders on your desktop, or deleting demoralizing musical choices from your iTunes
- Commit to spending time culturing yourself by reading books that have nothing to do with your thesis topic. Extra points if you pick something complicated (read: pretentious) that takes 20 minutes per page.
- Reinvigorate your creative side by committing to write pieces on mildly amusing happenings of your day. Be sure to spend extra time trying to make it mildly amusing.